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Thursday, August 25, 2011

My Daughter's first day at school

We got up this morning and got our oldest little girl ready for school for the first time.  We had been home schooling her, but with the economy is such rough shape, we had to send the two oldest to school as we won't have time with the wife and I working so much.  The second child is in kindergarten, and won't start til Monday (depending on Irene), but the oldest one tested into second grade and started today.

We dropped her at her class at 8:15.  At 9:30, the principle called and said we had a problem.  Apparently my little girl took her pocketknife to school.  She wasn't showing it off, or threatening any of the other kids with it, but the teacher found it when she went through her bookbag.

My daughter admitted that it was her knife, but said she didn't know how it got into her bookbag.  I'm pretty sure that was a lie, and I have talked to her about lying, but if she had a lawyer, that would have been what he told her to say.  The principle told my wife that he was sure it was an unintended accident, but we can't let it happen again.

Fast forward to 3:00 high.  I go to the school to pick her up, and I have to discuss this rule with the assistant principal.  My immediate assessment of him was that he was a draft dodging liberal.  He explained to me that weapons (of any kind) are forbidden at school, and the next offense would be expulsion.  Expulsion?  Over a f%$king pocketknife?  I couldn't let him get away with that, so I told him the definition of "weapon":

weaponarm, or armament is a tool or instrument used with the aim of causing damage or harm (either physical or mental) to living beings or artificial structures or systems. In human society weapons are used to increase the efficacy and efficiency of tasks such as hunting, fighting, defense, the committing of criminal acts, the preserving of law and order, and the waging of war.

I then told the sanctimonious SOB that the school required me to send my kid to school that day with 4 sharpened #2 pencils in her bag.  Now I'm no liberal chickenshit, but I'd rather be attacked with a one and a half in pocketknife blade than a nine inch pencil.  In the hands of a trained killer, a pencil is a nasty weapon.  In the hands of a trained killer, a plastic spoon is a nasty weapon.  In the hands of my seven year old little girl, a pocketknife is a tool used for cleaning her fingernails, or cutting threads, or sharpening her #2 pencil.  Besides, if she wanted to hurt anyone in that school, I have already taught her the "wrist lock" and the "reverse wrist lock" which will put a grown man on his knees begging you to please stop hurting him.

When I was in school, I carried a pocketknife everyday, unless I had lost it.  Then I didn't carry one until I had mowed enough lawns or raked enough leaves to get a new one.   I may have been in a fistfight or two on school grounds.  I may have been in a fistfight or two off school grounds.  But I never pulled my pocketknife to threaten a kid.  They would have just laughed and called me a queer (very offensive in the late seventies and early eighties, at least for real boys).

But I never had the principle call my folks on the first day of school.  Way to go, girl.

17 comments:

  1. LOL! Good post.

    It looks like you will have an exciting year.

    By the way, WTF was the teacher doing going through your kid's bookbag?

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  2. Hardnox,

    I think the teacher was just helping her unpack. I met with the teacher the other night, and she struck me as not a complete leftie. Not a true conservative, but not a complete whacko either.

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  3. Hey TGP- I can not speak intelligently on the N.C. school system. So My comment is based off the Il. schools. Your daughter might have been repremanded for fear of lawsuit. Of course a sharpened #2 pencil is just as dangerous as a pocketknife, but the ACLU does not look at it the same. Here in Chicago, 8 year olds bring guns to school. At least you don't have to deal with that

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  4. I hope we don't have that to deal with. Disarming a pistolero isn't on my schedule to teach the girls until seventh grade.

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  5. Not to worry, most gunkids here still believe the sight is on the "side" of the barrel. They are more likely to shoot a 3 year old

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  6. Now you have me worried. I have a three year old.

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  7. 10th - I am impressed. I made it all the way to third grade before my parents got called in the first time.

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  8. Knives? I brought a Daisey lever action pop gun to show and tell one day and nobody batted an eye about it...it was looked at as normal for a boy to have one back then.
    We all carried little knives...shit you could even win them at the school carnival!

    Today, they'd lock down the school, have all the kids hiding under desks until the SRT team got to them and, have SWAT snipers on nearby rooftops.

    If that teacher had an old skool bone in her body, that knife would have landed in her desk with the "you'll get this back at the end of the year" speech and that would have been the end of it.

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  9. Sepp,

    I called my uncle (the retired Army CommandSergeantMajor). He said he used to take his .22 to school, and put it in his wall locker, on the days when final exams coincided with opening day of squirrel season.

    It is definitely a different world.

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  10. My immediate assessment of him was that he was a draft dodging liberal

    What does a 'draft-dodging liberal' look like these days? It's been so long since we had the draft that I've forgotten what 'they' look like.

    Did he have a photo of Mao on his wall? Long, unkempt hair? A guitar in the corner of the room? Peace symbols hanging around his neck?

    You know, Tenth, with your astute acuity for 'spotting' the enemy, the CIA could use your services over in Afghanistan to help them 'spot' the Taliban leaders.

    With your 'immediate assessment' skills, you'd be a very valuable asset to our fight over there. Look in the phone directory for your nearest CIA Recruiting Headquarters and offer them your uncanny services.

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  11. Muddy,
    You can usually spot them about 5 seconds into a sentence.

    The Orwellian newspeak and Clintonese is a dead givaway.

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  12. Sepp,

    Muddy is no longer welcome here. His childish refusal to even wish the people, including a large number of liberal Obama voters ( unless voter fraud is the reason NC went for Obama) has pissed me off completely. And his biggest concern that they cancelled the MLK blah, blah, blah.

    I cannot believe he has the nerve to call someone else childish.

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  13. 10th-This is just another example of the sad "state" of affairs some wish to 'change" America---these bozos would even conviscate a metal edge RULERThat so called "teacher" is nothing more than a branwashed KOOL-AID vendor!kudos for you in staning up.

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  14. Muddy celebrates the Martin Luther Orwell version of what the left has created and revised from a guy who has been dead, gone and, unable to defend his own beliefs since 1968 which muddy's ilk has warped into nothing that resembles the dream King had espoused.

    I'm sure that King's vision had something to do with giving everyone a fair shot at the same goals when equal effort was involved.

    The muddys out there have made it government policy stating that blacks are not equal and never can be.
    Equal individuals putting in equal effort don't need laws saying they are...they simply are and are regarded as such.

    Muddy would be much happier at an Al Sharpton or, Jesse Jackson memorial since race cards, race hustling and liberal white guilt politics are a better match for him than "Judged by the content of character" will ever be in leftist groupthink.

    King's dream died the same time he did and, Jesse Jackson has made millions ever since distorting it and selling it to idiots like muddy.

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  15. Lord help him if we judge Mud by the content of his character. He's a piece of shit.

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  16. -Sepp -

    You are probably going to counsel me for being a slow learner, but I did go over to Mud_Sling's site again.

    It makes me feel a little guilty - much like someone who teases the animals as the Zoo must feel.

    They seem over joyed that I'm there so they can chide, chastise, and bleat out insults. It's like having gnats buzzing around you while you're trying to work.

    I generally read through what I write before I hit submit - even then a mistake sneaks through from time-to-time. I can't believe that any of them actually do that. their comments must be driven by blind hormonal rage.

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  17. CS,
    Posting over there causes liberal male menopausal estrogen levels to spike and they go batshit pounding out juvenile replies that most often make little sense and, have even less to do with the topic at hand.
    If you make a valid point they can't get around, the topic will just free fall into petty insults in order to change the subject quickly.

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